Makhanya returns after suicide struggles

Makhanya returns after suicide struggles

South African middle-distance runner Mapaseka Makhanya is back on the road after overcoming a mental battle that saw her contemplating suicide. 

The former Spar Grand Prix series 10km champion lost her younger brother to a car accident back in 2019 before her father died months later in 2020.

Her mother subsequently resigned from her job and could not cope with the loss of a son and husband in quick succession, while Makhanya was also badly affected and quit running for two years.

At the time she says she wanted to quit the sport as well as end her life, however, she made a return by taking part in the Johannesburg 10km race at Marks Park last weekend.

"At that moment, you don't see that, you don't feel that because we hide in a corner and you think nobody cares - you don't want to talk to anyone and you also feel like you are a burden to people, so you don't want to burden anyone with your problems," explained Makhanya.

"So you just sit in the dark and ask yourself, 'What am I living for? There's nothing for me  here, I've lost all I cared for.' So, I was at that point but I'm glad I'm ok now, and I'm on the road.

"Also, with the support that I get not just from the media but from the running community and Charles [Baloyi] also, he has been persistent in calling me and checking up on me. Sometimes, I don't even want to do a story because it's always a sad story.

"I said, 'Don't call me, I don't want to talk,' but that makes me feel like I'm important, not just in the running community but in the world, that people care about me and always want to see me win - not just winning a race but winning the battle."

Having been training consistently for only four weeks, Makhanya intends to run the final leg of the Grand Prix series in Cape Town on 23 October.

"I'm at that point where I'm going to live. I'm not going to go to a race because I want to win, I'm going to go to a race because it makes me happy and I want to run - that's my happy space," she added.

"I've been trying to train, and only for the past three of four weeks, I've been training consistently. Hopefully, I'll run the Cape Town Spar Ladies Race, I'll start doing my speed work next week and see how I feel."

By Charles Baloyi